February 29, 2008
The Manifestation 2-Step
I've been tinkering recently with a few manifestation techniques as part of my ongoing "I live what I teach" process that I share with my "It's Obvious, Stupid!" print newsletter subscribers. Naturally, I'm keeping the specifics of what I am doing (and also the interesting results I'm getting!) for them, but it's interesting to note a couple of things that I thought might be worth sharing with you.
Firstly, there is always a challenge of getting the balance of your thinking right. Even the most positive people in the world (like myself) have times where, no matter what they try and do, they can't easily get out of a down mood.
Now, in the past, I may have beaten myself up over the fact that I wasn't thinking positively, but now I realize that its much better to just let my mood get on with it, and accept that I'm much better off focus my positive thoughts and energy when I'm in a much more positive mood!
Life is about balance...and sometimes due to circumstances in your life, it's not always easy to stay on the positive side. The less you let it get to you the better, and just accept that, as long as you try to look for feeling a little bit better, then that's all you can do until your mood shifts.
Secondly...I see so many people just literally wandering around in a daze, just going through the motions of life. What a waste! I can see the (often negative) thoughts whirring around behind their eyes as they walk around. Little do they know that most of the time, they are literally creating what they fear!
I know this stuff because it's exactly what I did with my separation last year from my wife of 14 years, Lesley. Almost everything I dread happening actually happened, almost as if I had scripted it myself! The hours I spent before we split up expecting the worst actually came true!
So, whatever you may be doing, and (more importantly) whatever you may be thinking - PLEASE just at least look for what you want in your life rather than focusing on what you don't want.
I can't stress how truly important this point is.
February 15, 2008
Yes You Can! But Only If Your Attitude Is Right...
I've been playing single dad all week to feisty 3-year-old Skye, and just a few months ago I would never have told you that I would have enjoyed it so much!
Sure, it has been 'interesting' at times, but I've noticed that, when I was married I would mentally look upon a lot of parenting stuff as an 'effort'. Now that I don't have much choice (and certainly appreciate my girls more), I find that I've changed.
Except, outwardly I haven't changed much - it's my ATTITUDE that has changed - and I can tell you that it has made a huge difference to how I look at how I spend my time generally.
You see, there are many things where you have to literally take a deep breath before you start them - usually because they don't come naturally to you.
Now, despite what I may have thought about myself in the past in regards to being a dad (or whatever I had been told about it in the past) - I now KNOW that I am more than capable of being as good a dad as anyone else. It wasn't that I was never around before, or didn't take an active role in the upbringing of my girls - it was just my attitude about my ability to do so was different. This was then outwardly reflected in how I appeared when I spent time with them. (You know what I mean!)
You see, it compares with public speaking. It's one of those things that are worse the more you think about it - yet, once you just get on with it - it's nowhere near as bad as you thought! Plus, once you do it once or twice - you realize that you are more than able to do it.
For me, it's taken me out of my comfort zone...but, like everything that I have done in the last six years, I have ONLY benefitted from it!
Not only that, once you realize this (and I will hold my hands up and say that I forgot it over the last few months because of my seperation) then your self-confidence will only increase, as well as your self-belief.
I'm a better person, as well as being a better dad...and I can certainly guarantee that if YOU just nudge yourself in a slightly different direction, you too will find out that you have talents and capabilities that you would never have believed!
Just try it and see for yourself...
February 01, 2008
My Life Lessons...
Yes, it's been a while. A fair few months in fact.
Well...let's say that whilst I've been away, I've learned so much about life that I KNOW that, just like 2001 when I quit my job forever to do this, 2008 WILL be a watershed year for me both in a personal and business sense.
And I want YOU to accompany me on the ride!
Although I can't promise nailed-on regular stuff for you (that is reserved for my friends who subscribe to my It's Obvious, Stupid! print newsletter) - I promise that I will be sharing some of the insights I am both learning AND applying in my OWN life...in a way that will absolutely help YOU.
So...let's just start off with the major lessons I've learned since the end of July last year when I separated from my wife, Lesley (her choice, remember!). Now, some of these things may sound negative - but they're not intended to - they are just the things I've learned, and which I will forever bear in mind over the years to come...
1. No matter how much you know someone, you can never know what they're thinking.
2. If you are motivated for someone else, make sure that, if they weren't around, you are STILL motivated!
3. Don't try to help other people when they either don't know they need it, or don't appreciate it - you'll only end up worse off.
4. People change (including you!) - sometimes almost overnight. The sooner you accept that change is the norm rather than the exception, the easier you will be able to manage change in your life in general.
4. Listen to your gut instinct - even if stuff doesn't work out in the way you hoped because of it. There is a bigger picture that is moving stuff around for your future, whether you realize it or not.
5. Focus on what you want and what you have, not what you don't want or have 'lost'.
6. Some things aren't personal or your 'fault'. You are still as capable as you have always been even if others make you feel otherwise.
7. Change is hard - but usually its because you NEED to change in order to take your life to the next level.
8. Your feelings are the key to working out what you want from your life. Don't block them out (like a typical man, I used to - not any more), or ignore what they are telling you.
Finally...the absolutely most important one of all...
Things like youir spouse, your children, your health, your standard of living, and your free time are just some of these very important things that, believe me, you don't realize how important they are. Guess why my daughters Katie and Skye are going to benefit from me being a much better dad to them - just because I appreciate them more than I ever have done.
Maybe one day if you meet me in person at a seminar somewhere and buy me a drink or two in the bar, I'll expand more on the experiences I had which reminded me why these lessons are so important.
Put it this way - adversity is an amazing teacher once you start looking for what you can gain from it!
So...what have YOU learned about life in the last six months? Feel free to comment below...
