Success...One Day At A Time

To Get Out Of Your Rut - Get Off Your Butt!

No more 'Mr Nice Guy'.

I've decided.

I've spent almost four years online writing constructive and positive articles.

I've gone out of my way to write in a way that gently supports you...at the same time as attempting to challenge you to make more of yourself.

I get emails from subscribers just like you who benefit greatly from this approach.

But...I also get to hear from those people who believe that they need MORE support.

You see...their situation is different...they are struggling, they're facing impossible challenges, they don't have time....blah blah blah.

If YOU are one of those people, you can do two things...

1) Get OVER IT! And get used to me challenging you to get up and DO something with your life.

2) Stop reading what I write. You know what to do to unsubscribe.

Over the last few years I, personally, have...

- Spent 20 hour days for four years caring for my disabled son, Connor. Believe me, having to resuscitate your child in the back of the car in rush-hour whilst your wife is driving is not fun.

- Lost him despite it all (and, if you've ever been to your own child's funeral, you'll know how difficult that is.)

- Had to tell his older sister (who was six at the time) - that the light of her life was never coming back.

- Been fired from a job after 11 years for something that I wasn't responsible for - with no job to go to.

- Suffered from (and beat) severe depression.

- In debt more than the equivalent of 2 years' worth of hard work.

- Seen the woman I love suffer from panic attacks because of all of the stress.

So...I think that I am qualified to be the judge as to whether I became successful BECAUSE of feeling sorry for myself, or IN SPITE OF all that happened.

I'm not telling you this to feel sorry for me - or to hold up a badge of 'my life has been worse than yours'.

Far from it. (In fact, whilst in hospital I realized how lucky my family was having only one disabled child!)

I'm telling you this because I am sick of the moaners, whiners, whingers, and complainers, who just sit feeling sorry about their lives - and expect OTHER people to sort it out for them!

They don't realize that the ONLY way that they will actually make more of themselves is by taking steps to do SOMETHING about it - instead of complaining how unlucky they are.

To be honest - I go out of my way to be constructive when I write because I know that the vast majority of people are motivated by a positive challenge.

Yet - even that isn't enough.

It's time for YOU to actually do something DIFFERENT than you did yesterday, last week, last month, last year.

The ONLY way things are going to change is if YOU change!

I'll let you into a little secret where success is concerned...

If you continue to go down the same path...then you're always going to end up in the same place!

NOBODY else can get you to a different place unless YOU physically take yourself there!

Of course, I can guide you based on what works for me - but YOU alone have to take the path that works for YOU.

Sitting at the beginning crying your eyes out isn't the best way to work out how to get there - that's for certain.

I make no apologies if I've offended you - sometimes you need to get a reaction - whether good or bad - to make some people take stock of their lives.

It's time for YOU to start looking at what you CAN do instead of why you can't.

And...if you're too stubborn to bother - then I cannot help you.

The Split-Second Path To Lazy Abundance

One of the biggest realizations came to me when I decided to resign from a 'proper' job and work for myself.

Literally overnight I decided to quit...despite not having any prospective means of supporting my family.

As if by magic...my depression lifted. I felt healthier. I smiled more.

And, the biggest realization?

I realized that, in the that split second, NOTHING outward had changed...I had just decided to quit - and hadn't actually even told my wife, Lesley about it, nor had I actually handed in my notice to my employer.

Yet...physically, emotionally, and mentally - EVERYTHING changed!

In that split-second I realized that my mind and my thoughts have a huge effect on the quality of my life.

And...if I could stop taking anti-depressants in that split second...then surely there were greater things that I could achieve as well.

Just at that moment I realized that what I focused my thoughts upon created the reality that I lived in.

One moment...I was miserable, the next inspired.

Literally overnight, I changed as a person as I reached (and pushed past) mentally-imposed limits that I had set for myself.

In the four years since - I have reached higher highs and lower lows than at ANY other time in my life - yet, armed with the knowledge that I am the one who is ultimate control of what 'gets to me' - I lead a life that most people would call stress free.

Stress free enough that I spent four hours on a golf course with my brother, Mark, today - whilst all of my old colleagues stood by a coffee machine complaining at how 'unlucky' they were.

Stress free enough that, despite not necessarily needing to, I felt that I owed YOU some words of motivation this afternoon before I put my feet up and read some more of my book.

Now...I'm certainly not saying this to brag as some days I work longer hours than most people I know, plus do a little bit at weekends, too.

And, I certainly haven't taken it easy over the last four years...I've taken more action during that time than most people do in a lifetime.

My brother Mark laughs at me because he reckons that I must do the least amount of work amongst everyone he knows!

It's true. But...because I know when, how, and why I work - I do less but achieve much more.

Because I know that I can...as I know that YOU can, too.

Life isn't about working to live...it's about making the best of what it throws at you - good and bad.

Me - I could work MUCH 'harder'...make much more...yet miss out on spending time being a part of my daughters' lives.

YOU - I bet that, if you really thought about it...YOU could make decisions and take action that would change the QUALITY of YOUR life overnight.

I'm not talking about quitting your job like I did.

I'm talking about focusing on ONE single positive thing in your day that really INSPIRES you to make more of yourself.

I'm different in that I don't like to measure my success in monetary terms. I'd much rather be abundantly happy, challenged, and inspired than be saddled with the pressure to chase an ever-increasing need to earn to keep up with my spending.

New gadgets, TVs, or cars don't inspire me.

Having done less of what I don't enjoy and more of what I do, for what I get in return, is what REALLY lights my fire inside.

I can tell you...the satisfaction you get from knowing that you are 'on form' - just for minutes in a day really motivates you.

Yet...all it takes is clicking that switch over in your brain that screams 'victim'...and turn it to the satisfying hum of 'I'm in control of my own destiny'.

Once you realize, like I did, that life's more about what you can't see than what you can...there'll be no stopping you!

Just try it and see.

I'm Watching You...

Here's an up-to-date picture of me and 'my girls' taken at my brother's wedding last month...

I've been doing a lot of thinking recently.

And...for the first time - I just deleted the eight paragraphs that I wrote over the last fifteen minutes.

Life was calling me - telling my analytical brain to shut up as it had a story to tell. In fact - a group of little stories, played out day-in, day-out by people who didn't realize that they were being watched...

Yesterday I spent a few hours waiting outside shops wheeling 9-month-old Skye around as Lesley did her usual I-can't-decide-which-one routine.

I watched grandmothers, mothers, and children weave in and out of each other as they window-shopped.

I watched bored workers on their lunch break sit and share their food with colleagues as they complained bitterly about their boss.

I watched as the girl behind the checkout aimlessly picked her fingers as a mother with a mad toddler struggled to keep her cool and her balance as she tripped on the low-hangind clothes that she was just about to get.

I watched as a nervous salesman tried to accost passers-by by thrusting an application form aimed at getting them more in debt.

I watched as Lesley laughed out loud at a funny t-shirt in a new boutique and made the girl standing next to her jump.

I watched as Skye began to 'dance' in her high-chair at the exact moment that a young couple with a tiny baby in tow looked over at us feeding her.

I watched as fellow drivers were getting more and more stressed as we sat in traffic for an hour because of an accident, whilst Lesley and I were singing along to a song at the top of our voices, car windows down.

I watched as Katie came out of school wearing her P.E. t-shirt because one of the boys in her class had been tripped - and tipped the contents of eight paint pots over her usual school shirt.

I winced as her nine-year-old elbow made contact with my ribs as I laughed as she told me!

I watched as the now-crawling Skye made a beeline for everything on the floor except her toys, and then proceeded to chew whatever it was almost in defiance of her mother.

I watched as Lesley turned on her back in bed at 10:30pm last night...and preceded to snore so loudly that I had to put my book down and turn off the light.

I watched through foggy eyes as Katie stood at the bedroom door this morning, an hour earlier than she should have, and did that little 'jig' of anger that stroppy children do when told that they should go back to bed.

I watched as she animatedly collared her best friend on the way into school - to excitedly share with her that their classmate had returned from vacation today - and will find out that she is sitting next to another girl whom she hates!

I watched as a boy was being dragged kicking and screaming into school, crying his eyes out saying that he didn't want to go, his mother getting more flustered, embarrassed, and angrier by the minute.

I watched as miserable-faced people aimlessly went about their business as I spent the 20-minute walk back home continuing my business education thanks to my Ipod.

Me...

I watched as I sat down in front of this computer - stumped for what to write to you today - yet knowing that it was only a matter of time before I would be able to make a connection with you.

Perhaps I didn't do it in the way that I usually do - but it certainly made me realize two important things that may help you, too...

1. Life is about breathing everything that it has to offer in, and about making what you do an experience rather than a chore.

2. Unless you start, you won't have a chance of finishing. And...it's only people who start who make the most of their life - whether they finish or not.

Thirty minutes ago - I was thinking that perhaps I should eat as I wasn't in the mood to write anything.

Instead - I just started...and whether you liked it or - I got what I need to achieve done.

Now I think I'll reward myself with some more watching as life shares it's experiences with me.

And it didn't cost me a single thing to make the most of it.

Recession? Admit It. It's All Your Fault...

There's a trap waiting for you.

It's one that you literally fall into on a quite regular basis.

It's called blame...passing the buck...having an excuse.

We've both been there, you and I.

It's quite often hard not to when from the very top of our society down - everyone blames everyone else.

"It's the government's fault that I can't."

"If they gave me more I would be able to do this."

"If only I had a chance of a better job then I would. "

"If only I had talent like them then I would be able to."

"If only I...replace with suitable excuse."

Sound familiar?

Welcome to the 'Blame Game'.

With the talk of 'recession', house price collapse, rising gas prices, and every other doomsday scenario being predicted at the moment - everyone is starting to blame everyone else.

Everyone is trying to make someone accountable when they are probably just as 'guilty' as anyone else.

When all is said and done - in this case anyway - WHO is to 'blame' is irrelevant. Taking decisive action now and learning from the 'mistakes' made in the past is what is important.

Blaming other people for the lack of YOUR success is a sure-fire way to failure.

Read that sentence again - just to make sure that you get it.

What goes in between those ears of yours is THE most important barometer of how successful you will be.

Many people are in worse situations than you may be in - yet 'deal' with it and make something of their lives.

Many people have 'survived' worse financial situations than you may be in - and end up living the life of their dreams.

Many people have actually made their fortunes during the worst 'recessions'!

Many people lost everything a few days ago - yet some will bounce back stronger than before...and others will complain about how unlucky they were and look to blame their situation on their lack of getting back on their feet.

Using excuses and placing the blame is the EASY way out.

And, not surprisingly - it's the EASY way to getting more of what you DON'T want.

It's time for you to stand up and accept complete responsibility for where you currently are.

Whatever situation you are currently in.

It's the ONLY way.

You can only fight your way out if you understand completely that it is YOU alone who are responsible for the success or failure of YOUR fight.

The world is full of miserable people who are full of excuses.

Don't let yourself be just another one of them.

YOU are so much better than that!