 Snowdrops and Lucky Reflections |
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Last Sunday (20th February) was the 2nd anniversary of losing Connor. We paid a visit (as we always do on his special occasions - like Sunday, his birthday, and Christmas) - to the children's hospice he used to visit - Demelza House. It is an understatement to say that Demelza House gives amazing help - not only to the special needs children that visit and get one-on-one attention - but also to the families like us - who were able to have some time doing 'normal' stuff whilst knowing that Connor would be well looked after. Their 'care' AFTER we lost Connor has also been wonderful. And...as 'luck' would have it - Demelza's annual 'snowdrop planting' to remember those children no longer with us - happened to be this Sunday. I counted 12 families who were there...drinking tea and coffee, eating cake and biscuits...all provided at no cost by an organization that unfortunately doesn't get a single penny in assistance from our government here in the UK. I watched as people were laughing, siblings were painting pots...and little groups of people stood silent as we remembered. It was strange (yet comforting too) to see other families like us whose lives had forever been changed by those special little children who unfortunately didn't make it. Some were lucky like us to have over four-and-a-half years learning from our special child...others shared just a few short weeks with theirs. Yet - even though it was an occasion of reflection - those 12 families were laughing, chatting, and generally getting along - despite all the obvious pain and hardship that they had been through - just like us. These people knew that they were the lucky ones in a way (I know that I certainly feel that way)...to have had the opportunity to experience life in a way that makes you REALLY appreciate how wonderful 'normal' life is. It's just a shame that I reckon if that room on Sunday had been full of 12 families of career go-getters who lived in nice houses and drove smart cars - I very much doubt that there would have been as much POSITIVE communication taking place. Wouldn't YOU agree that that's such a shame? Life certainly isn't as 'bad' as you think when you realize what these (and other people who go through similar trials) go through just to be able to get out of the door in the morning! It's easy to sit in front of the TV wishing that your lotto numbers come up because life is 'unfair'. Just try getting up in the morning knowing that you're one gasp away from a blue-faced son who need resuscitation whilst your wife calls an ambulance. But - even THAT isn't unfair - that's just a thing called life! Life is all about perspective...don't make yours worse just because you believe that you're unlucky. You're not - YOU are certainly one of the LUCKY ones - yet you probably don't realize it. And I'll be the first to raise my hand to say that I was just like you, too...until a special little boy called Connor came along and made me REALLY appreciate how LUCKY I was after all.
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